‘The difference [the team] made was incredible. They stood beside us and didn’t leave until we were okay. I just remember thinking how lucky we were to have them.’
Dorcas Lydford is preparing to take on our epic Great Wall of China Trek in November 2026, in memory of her beloved mum, Marj – and to raise vital funds for the hospice services that supported Marj in her final days.
Dorcas, from Buxton, explained: ‘Mum had vascular dementia and a weak heart because of it. She was pootling along, but it eventually became too much for my Dad to cope with as her main carer. She went into a nursing home for some respite, but as soon as she went in, it was like a switch flipped – she knew it was the end for her. Within three weeks, she was receiving end of life care. We were shocked at how quickly she declined.
‘The nursing home was struggling to manage her needs, so my sister and I stayed by her side every day and slept on the floor to be there for her. The district nurses suggested the Blythe House Hospice Roaming Car service, and Mum was referred. She was so distressed and in a lot of pain.
‘The Blythe House team turned up – around 9 or 10 o’clock at night – and they were just amazing. I thought they’d rush in, help Mum, and be on their way again. We knew how busy they were and the huge area they cover. But once Mum was settled, the two nurses turned to us and said: “So how about you?”
‘We were so shocked that someone asked – and truly cared. They said: “No really, how are you?” We didn’t want to hold them up, but I was so touched. I wasn’t okay – my mum was dying. The fact they gave us time; we couldn’t thank them enough. Their care and genuine empathy made all the difference. Someone was on our side. It was such a horrendous time; we had no idea Mum would be gone within three weeks. But the Blythe House team was so kind – we felt that someone was there for Mum, and for us.
‘I think a lot of people locally have heard of Blythe House – I’d seen fundraising events and been into the shops – but I didn’t realise the team would, or could, come out to visit Mum. The difference they made was incredible. They went above and beyond. They stood beside us and didn’t leave until we were okay. I just remember thinking how lucky we were to have them.
‘We were desperate for Mum not to have to go into hospital. Of course, we were realistic – given how much pain she was in – but the idea of moving her again, especially when she’d found the nursing home so distressing, was just something we were really keen to avoid. Without Blythe House’s support, I assume her pain wouldn’t have been managed so quickly, and she would have suffered even more. The service was absolutely essential.
‘Thanks to the team’s compassion and care, Mum was able to pass away with dignity in July 2024, surrounded by love. They answered every question, showed such kindness, and made sure we all felt supported through one of the most difficult times of our lives.
‘Their warmth and compassion left a lasting mark on me. That’s why I want to raise money – not only to say thank you, but to help ensure other families can experience the same care and support when they face their own goodbyes.
‘The past few years have brought many highs and lows, and I’ve spent much of my time caring for others. Losing Mum was enormous – we were so close – and I just needed to do something for me. Mum always worried that I never got the chance to ‘be me’, because I was always the one looking after everyone else. When the Great Wall of China Trek popped up on my Facebook, I immediately thought: “That’s it – that’s the one!” It came at exactly the right time.
‘As 2026 approaches – which will be my 50th year – I’ve decided to take on this incredible challenge to support Blythe House, and also to re-focus on something I’ve often put aside: my own mental and physical health.
‘This trip is a gift to myself – a chance to step out of my comfort zone, push my limits, experience something completely new and go on a big adventure. Mum always encouraged us to do that.’
